Dear Radscum Feminists
Tiny bit angrier than what I’d write, but Audre Lorde addresses the Uses of Anger in her Sister Outsider collection (which is totally a must read). I do resonate with that second paragraph strongly, though and yeah, I support the rest of the message even if it’s a bit extreme for my palate.
[Trigger warning: discussion of transphobia, brief mentions of the nature of triggers, cutting, general violent imagery, rape, and hate speech]
If your idea of ridding the world of it’s patriarchal misogyny is by going around telling trans* women that they are less of a woman for whatever reason, that they are upholding sexist ideals of beauty (but we’ll ignore cis women femmes and support them), or even insinuating on ANY level that any violence they face is warranted and justifiable, then you are not a human being.
Period.
Now I admittedly am not the best ally when it comes to trans* issues because of ignorance. There’s much I don’t understand and subsequently, am afraid to speak up and say the wrong things. But you know what? This shit ain’t about me. It’s not about me being ignorant, which is my own motherfucking fault for not taking the time to educate myself, or my fear of being called out for slipping up. Right now, you radfemheads, it’s about YOU. Now if you want something to comment on, here it is. So let’s get this started.
Anonymous asked: So it appears that there are a lot of WoC that were pretty put off about your tweet comparing the victim blaming of Trayvon Martin to the victim blaming of rape victims. I must admit that I am pretty nervous to confront a prominent feminist that I look up to greatly, but I will also have to admit that the comparison somewhat disappointed me. I don’t disagree with you entirely - there are definitely parallels, but white feminists comparing their struggles to PoCs has always seemed inappropriate.
I’m unsure why you believe that victim-blaming in sexual assault is a “white” feminist issue - women who aren’t white, cis, straight are disportionately victim-blamed, but that’s a point for another conversation.
By tweeting that discussing Trayvon Martin’s possible marijuana use was as relevant as discussing whether a rape victim ever had a beer, I wasn’t conflating rape with Martin’s murder - I was making an analogy about victim-blaming. It’s a similar analogy that was made by many, many others re: blaming Trayvon for wearing a hoodie.
The point of the tweet was to point out the shamelessness with which the media is attempting to blame Trayvon Martin. Creating an analogy to make that point doesn’t shift focus away from Martin, or “compare struggles” - it highlights the ridiculousness and unjustness of the situation. I hope that clarifies the tweet a bit for you. Thanks for taking the time to ask.
… anyone wanna tackle this? or not. no obligation. but… hoo boy.
I’m not even tackling this myself:
“Rape and misogyny are rape and misogyny, and lynching and racism are lynching and racism. Not the same thing. So please don’t attempt to turn a conversation about racism into a conversation about patriarchy.”
“I recognize that you’re critiquing the media discourse, but you’ve unintentionally, perhaps-turned something about race into something about patriarchy, and I’m afraid doing this reinforces the disappearance of racial problems in mainstream feminism.” @thomcourtney
Valenti should really just pay attention to the conversations she’s having on twitter and read the full message before jumping to defend herself.
(via poison--paradigm)
Source: jessicavalenti
Turning “the story” into every day conversation and hoping that the mention of the “R” word and how it happened to you doesn’t change how your friends look at you.
submitted by serenechaos
Essentially, this was my last night.
Source: survivor-problems
Whedon, feminism, school and facebook.
[Edit trigger warning for blatant angry discussion of rape/abuse in Whedon’s work.]
Started talking about Joss Whedon’s not feminism today. The best and only arguments that were sent my way: “The [rape/abuse] scene wasn’t about [female character], it was about [(usually white) male character].” and for context the following:
Me: It’s amazing how much Whedon hates women. Regardless, [Dollhouse/Rapehaus is] a damn good show and he’s a fantastic storyteller.
Other: What makes you say he hates them?
Me: His consistent torture and degradation of women. Maybe it’s all the rape. Little bit of the racism and silencing of people of color. For a self-proclaimed feminist, he’s done some terrible shit to his female characters, especially his WoC.
Other: Storytelling requires conflict/obstacles to move the story forward.
I stopped right there. Because. Really?
Storytelling needs rape and abuse to move the story forward. Lol, my bad, I’ve been doing it so wrong forever.
STORY NOT ENGAGING ENOUGH? RAPE HER. STILL NOT ENGAGING? ABUSE HER. STILL NO? RECONCILE EVERYTHING AND WHEN THE FANS LOVE HER, KILL HER OFF.
Please, feel free to add on/edit. Click through for larger file.
The first fucking no means no. For fuck’s sake, brotips.
See brotip #993
Source: brotips
“He and I had something beautiful but so dysfunctional it couldn’t last.”
Oh, look. Someone’s given you access to a gun.
I hope to God that it’s not a concealed weapon that you’re allowed to take out of that firing range. This is scary as shit.
Though, I doubt you’d ever use it since your style is more “rape while she’s asleep and do it gently” than “coerce her with a gun”. But then again, if we were to take into account all the times that you molested me, you might eventually turn into the kind of guy who would coerce with violence.
This is so fucked.
I miss us.
—
Mikey, I’m trying.
Spanish exam had His last name on it. Threw me off my game. Ugh. Listening to next to normal so I can get my emotions into a manageable bundle.
What Does it Mean to be an Ally to a Sexual Assault Survivor?
We use the term “ally” for someone who is truly supportive of the survivor. Often people in the survivor’s life are trying to be helpful, but are doing so in ways that don’t feel helpful or supportive to the survivor. Examples: encouraging the survivor to “leave it in the past,” trying to “cheer up” a survivor who is feeling sad or angry, or attempting to have the survivor view the abuse as less painful because “it could have been worse.” These strategies: denial, avoidance, and minimization are commonly used by survivors and those trying to “help,” but they interfere with the process of true healing.
Source: bklynboihood
